Friday, October 16, 2009

New Day!!

Yesterday was a hard day.
We had incidents with Mattie's teacher, and FINALLY got her moved into a better class.

Now hope full she will have better blood sugars, YEAH!!

I am still testing her at midnight and 3:00 am, since that is when our bodies produce the most hormones.

And, I ate and got some rest.

My cute husband cleaned our house, and got me Carl's Jr. for dinner. I had been craving a big juicy, messy hamburger!!

I still have so much ANXIETY.....
the incidents that happened at Mattie's school, were bad, bad enough I had to contact an attorney and was told that I do have a case.

Although, extremely messy and expensive. We decided not to pursue the case and to work it out the best we can for Mattisin's sake.

I can't go into detail yet of the case on a blog, but..
I still feel as though I was brushed aside, they still are making me feel that they are not taking me serious. I want them to know that this teacher has personally affected Mattie.

I am sure it must be really hard to be a teacher, and have to worry about a diabetic.
But, when your child fears that teacher, and is afraid to tell the teacher about her diabetes issues, that to me is a big deal.

Well, we did get her moved and all I can hope now is that it will be better from here on out and move on. (my moms advice is always best)

Time heals us, and it will take some time. It's Friday !!

I hope every one has a good weekend and here is a happy quote to end on:

There is only one way to happiness,
and that is cease worrying about the things
which are beyond the power of our will.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

My { Heart } is aching

I love that song "Smile",
It says:

Smile though your heart is aching
Smile even though its breaking
When there are clouds in the sky,
youll get by
If you smile through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
Youll see the sun come shining through for you

Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
Thats the time you must keep on trying
Smile, whats the use of crying?
Youll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile.

Sometimes it is easier said than done.

A blog is supposed to be some ones "personal journal"
I have always been afraid to post feelings, or thoughts on my blog,
always afraid to offend some one or look like a "Debbie downer"

Well, today.. I don't care anymore

I have a personal health issue that I have struggled with for a long time, my illness almost cost me my life a couple of times and I almost lost my daughter in a custody battle.

It NEVER goes away,
It can be easier,
It can be HARD,
And I am still not sure I am ready for people to know!!

On top of my OWN personal issue,

I am the mother of a little girl with two cronic health issues.
Mattie is a Type 1 Diabetic and an epileptic.
It is NEVER GOING TO GO AWAY!!! (the reality of that is hard enough to face)
It can be easy at times,
not only for me, but for Mattie as well.
She gives 10 + shots to her self daily,
test her blood sugars several times daily, right now we are averaging 13 TESTS DAILY.
Mattie is now going through the puberty stages, (YEAH ME) NOT!!
It is more difficult on a diabetic going through puberty,
our bodies produce more hormones, hence HIGHER SUGARS,

More testing,
More sleepless nights,
Extreme high's and lows,
Constant calls to the doctor,

How EXTREMELY difficult ALL of this is.

On top of this,
I AM supposed to WORK FULL TIME !!!
It is near impossible,
I am up testing all night,
up early for work,
CONSTANT anxiety... (how is Mattie)
Worry, stress and even DEPRESSION.

OOH such as life right?

Well, we will survive and I know that I have lots of things to be

Stay tuned for me of:
These are the days of Heidi Rogers!!